Have you ever experienced the holidays as a hassle or struggled with a tight budget? You do not need to feel pressured into buying pricy items when you can discover the hidden priceless ones. These gifts are timeless. They have no price tag, they do not wear out, and they do not go out of style. They give you an opportunity to celebrate the deeper meaningful experiences in your lives. The following are seven tips for discovering these invaluable gifts.
You also may learn more about these gifts, ask questions, and gain ideas, by participating in our teleconference next Thursday at 4:00 PM CDT. If you are not already on my list, just sign up in the box on the right and I will send you the details on webcast link and call in number.
Here are seven tips:
1) Recognize that the best gifts are more than material items. Often the gifts that are the most meaningful are the creative ones that touch the heart. They can be hand-written notes of appreciation, a poem that you frame, pictures in a photo album, acts of service, and gifts of love and touch. All of these gifts are more intangible, and yet they are deeply meaningful.
2) Recognize and appreciate your strengths and those of others. When you are in your strengths, you are absorbed, in the flow, and feel deeply gratified by what you are doing. These are the activities that give your life purpose and meaning. Being able to identify these strengths is one big clue to discovering the invaluable gifts.
For example, I have a sister that thoroughly enjoys taking pictures and putting them into albums, another enjoys cooking, another does crafts, and I enjoy organizing family teleconferences where appreciations can be shared. Each of these activities is a gift. It reflects an underlying strength.
Positive psychology has identified twenty four character strengths, which cluster into six main virtues that are common to all cultures and traditions. Everyone has these strengths; usually three to five are used more frequently and become signature strengths. When you become aware of these strengths you will find that they give you an expansive creative mindset that gives a deeper and more long lasting sense of happiness than just the experience of pleasure alone. When you better understand your strengths, they will also help you appreciate the strengths of others. Watch for them, because they will give you clues as to the kinds of gifts that others appreciate and enjoy. When you join our list, I will send you a list of these strengths and how to find your signature strengths.
3) Celebrate strengths by taking a moment to reflect on what you most appreciate about the people in your life. When you share what you appreciate with them, it builds up their awareness of their strengths and affirms their gifts to you. It is much easier for a person to appreciate their strengths when they have feedback from others.
4) Cherish your stories. Behind every strength there is a story. The best stories are those where a challenge was overcome. You might notice what your loved ones did and how you appreciated it. Take time to describe how they rose to the occasion to overcome the obstacle. Even better is to write it up and include a picture or two. You and your loved ones will cherish them for many years to come.
5) Appreciate the gift of differences. Often friends and family have different views from ourselves. When they push our buttons, it may not seem like a gift. Think again. They would not create a hassle unless they cared. You might want to discover the gift of forgiveness, and turn the frustration into compassion. Or, you might what to check if there is a hidden strength lurking underneath. A good sense of humor is a great bonus.
6. Appreciate the gifts of age. So often, we place an emphasis on the strengths of one age, such as our own. When we do so, we may unconsciously favor one age or another, and ignore the contributions of other ages. All to often we might forget the gifts of wisdom and the spirit of those who have gone before us or the gift of curiosity and exploration of the younger ones. When we acknowledge the contributions of all the ages, all are included and we become more joyous in our celebration.
7. All gifts of pleasure, such as tasty food, new clothes, and toys, are more long lasting and meaningful when combined with an appreciation of our strengths of character. When we include gifts that reflect our strengths, such as in our stories and appreciation of differences, we feel a much deeper gratification than from material items alone. Our view of the world expands and creative gift ideas begin to flow. These gifts keep on giving. They are priceless. Take time to discover and celebrate them during your holidays.
Warmly,
Dr. Alice
Copyright Alice Vlietstra 2008
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